Top Book Tour Tips

From someone who has done it one million times

My book tour isn’t totally over—I have an event in Wilton, CT tomorrow, one in Long Island next Saturday, some in the UK in June, and a few sprinkled throughout the summer, but my hardcore travel is done, thank god. For anyone about to embark on a book tour, though, or heavy travel of any kind, I thought I’d do a little Top Book Tour Tips Round-up.

1. Wear a mask on the airplane.

   This is such an easy one. You don’t want to get sick. There is always someone coughing on a plane, and you don’t want those germs. Some people are more hardcore than I am and mask in the airport, too, but at this point, I just have the masks on me and save ‘em for the planes.

2. Pack as light as you possibly can.

   Who is checking a bag??? Not me!! Not on your life. For most of the tour, I was in each city for something like 18 hours. I am not wasting an hour waiting for my bag. I have places to go. I packed heavier than usual, and was really pushing the limits of the carry-on lifestyle, but that was a risk I was willing to take. I had my trusty rolly-bag and my squishy Baggu cloud bag and my Baggu packing cubes and I was good to go. The Baggu fits on the back of the suitcase so it’s not a pain to schlep through the airport.

   

3. Packing cubes are the one true path.

   I will die on this hill. As a true mess, I will take up as much space as I can with all my things. Cubes make it impossible to be a slob! Everything has its place! One cube for undies and socks, one for t-shirts and soft pants, one for hard pants, one for dresses, etc! Everything gets squeezed in with its siblings and so you always know where everything is, and it all stays organized.

4. You only need two lipsticks.

   I mean, you do you, but what I mean is, you really only need two choices for most things. I had a pinky lipstick and a red lipstick. I had my fancy shoes and my Sabahs and a pair of sneakers that I wore on planes. That’s three, but my Sabahs pack so flat they hardly count. My point is, this is not the place to bring a million choices.

5. Write thank you notes.

   I put this in my newsletter already, but it is important, so please forgive me for repeating it: step one, order personalized stationery. Step two, bring it with you, and fun stamps. Step three, write thank you notes every night or morning! Send them immediately! This will make you feel like a superhero.

6. Sleep as much as possible.

   Self-explanatory. I had some sleeping pills from my doctor and I did use them on nights when I could not sleep. When you don’t sleep, the world is bleak as hell. I also slept on every single plane. My eye mask (that also is a bluetooth speaker) is my number one.

7. Pack snacks.

   Being on tour always reminds me of this stanza of “The Day Lady Died,” Frank O’Hara’s poem about Billie Holiday. In no other way does book tour remind me of Billie Holiday dying, but this stanza is exactly what it feels like to get on a plane every day and not know where or when or if you’re going to get a meal in:

   It is 12:20 in New York a Friday
   three days after Bastille day, yes
   it is 1959 and I go get a shoeshine
   because I will get off the 4:19 in Easthampton   
   at 7:15 and then go straight to dinner
   and I don’t know the people who will feed me

Meaning, pack snacks. I always had That’s It bars and bags of nuts and dried fruit. Elizabeth Strout was in the store signing her book this morning and she said she and her husband ate five Powerbars on their way home from her event in Long Island last night because they were starving to death. Pack your bars, people! Here are me n Liz outside my store, I don’t know why I stand like this but I do know it’s going to make my bones disintegrate someday.

8. Talk to your friends.

   This one is tricky! When you book an event, the bookstore will ask if you have any ideas for who to talk to. Maybe you have a million friends in that town and maybe you know no one. If you have a million friends, think about who you have the most natural, fun conversations with, and pick that person. (Sorry, I should have said—these friends are all writers! Do you have friends with other jobs?? Weird!!) You want, ideally, someone whose work might bring other people to the event, sure, but more than that, you want someone who is going to bring out the best in you.

9. Wear good outfits.

   They don’t have to be fancy outfits, or expensive. My Anne Tyler suit was like $200 bucks! For a three piece suit! They just have to be comfortable while sitting down and also standing up but mostly sitting down. This is not the time for a miniskirt. (I don’t believe in miniskirts any time, actually, but that’s on me and my knees.) Make sure you can wear it over and over again. Patterns are good because they don’t show stains as easily. Oh! Pack a Tide pen! That’s another one.

10. Marco Polo is the superior app.

    I use Marco Polo every day, not just on book tour, but it’s great while traveling, because you can record messages any time you like and your friends will get back to you whenever they can. It’s the best way to make and keep friends. Marco Polo is the GOAT, I wish all my friends used it.

11. Eat vegetables.

    Listen, you can eat French fries and burgers every day if you want! Obviously! Delicious! This is more an AND situation. I have found that challenging myself to eat as many vegetables as I can in a day (I don’t care about fruit or protein, who cares) makes me feel better, especially while traveling.

12. Use the post office.

    Did you pack some bulky thing that you’re not using/wearing? Send it home!!! The USPS is your friend! Go to an adorable post office! Send a box! You can also send presents! Long live the USPS. Buy more stamps while you’re there.

Ok I could do this all day but 12 seems like plenty. Thank you for coming to my Ted Talk!